As thick as a brick

A poet and painter
behind glasses thick
seeks out musings
he hopes will stick.

A few reads his poems
at best labored verses.
Even fewer gets a drift
by skimming the surface.

A few sees his artwork,
plots at best scatter.
Even fewer has a clue
if it's guache or water.

He paints no fairytale
nor pens any spite well,
inking what's paintable,
daubing what he can tell.

Yet our poet and painter
as thick as brick.
Gets not he lacks the gift,
that rare touch or trick.

He strives for a way
to make a canvas glow
He hopes there be a day
for his words to flow.

A dreamer not doer
behind glasses thick
keeps laboring his craft
to be truly unique.

April 3rd

I remember the day
I forgot pain –
knocked out craftily
but rebounced.
I remember the day
I forego bondage –
vowed not to be used
and then declared useless.
I remember the day
I stopped stagnating –
liberated from
self-imposed prison.
felt such a relief!
I remember the day
a long chapter closed –
friends, way too many,
left behind in a blink.
I remember the day
I forgot to look back –
God suddenly opened
a new door.

The last few days

A walk in the park
The last rays of the setting sun
vanishes in the wings
of the home-bound flock.

Across from the lake
the trees frame the rising moon –
yellowish white and full.

Another Spring day comes to an end
Rain keeps falling unendingly
droplets on windshield blur my view
as a barge lazes down Mississippi.

The trees quiver in gusty wind.
In saturated twilight
their shapes appear ghostly

Rain pours into the eve
forcing a nip in the air
as another spring day ends.

From the bedroom window

The March snow melts away
the late winter gloom-
The pear tree in the back bursts
into a snow-white bloom.
Pure! Perfect! Pristine!

It's still chilly but
Spring is here for sure.
Birds have returned to my yard this morn -
The Blue Jay, the Robin and the Swallow too
to sing for a little girl like you.
Their incessant chirps fill my heart with joy
A happiness only you can bring!

Soon the daisies will be here -
Filling our gardens far and near.
Aren't they pure and lovely?
They are - just like you.

Blogger's note: this was written for a little girl, my niece, in India who is going to celebrate the first important milestone of her life - Annaprashan or Rice Eating Ceremony after which she will start eating solid food. It is a big part of our tradition and culture.

A Prayer for Anna

Today at work I got a call from Tracy. One of her classmates from the Leadership Academy is going through trying times with his little girl who needs lot of medical attention. She mentioned that there is a benefit concert at a local club called Hi-tone for the little girl Anna and asked if we would be going. I don't know her, I met her dad Zach twice or thrice at different Academy gatherings.

But I am glad that we did. A little prayer can go a long way. There was huge turnout and the bands played beautifully. There was different emotion flowing and there were tear-jerking moments. Standing inside the crowded club, this is what I wrote in prayer for this girl

Tonight the hi-tone resonates
the hope of all wishers -
The music traverses and takes
our collective prayers.
May the spirit of this crowd
bring in a heavenly boon,
Let the little girl
be cured very soon.

We suffer, we feel the pain
Let not this effort go in vain.
As the music wanes into the night
Lord give her the courage to fight.
A day we each here will gladly give
But Lord let little Anna have a long life.

© 2009 Sanjoy Haldar

On Your 2nd Birthday

As time goes by another year
To give you I only have love and tear.

I wish I found the time machine
to fetch for your maa a medicine.
Then travel I must
back right to the past
to stop you from leaving.
But today I pray for your wellbeing!

Today, all sent their special wish
Your absence we badly miss.
From India came a small toy
But missing was the Birthday boy.

We miss you everyday
We miss you even more today
Wherever you are, whatever you do
Know that we will ever love you.

© 2009 Sanjoy Haldar

The joy I feel in thy presence

As I stroll through a forest with trees tall
I feel like inside a medieval cathedral
with vaulted ceiling and spacious hall.
As I soak in the fresh air,
get lost in the dead silence -
I feel the same eternal peace
that comes from the burning incense.

I feel your presence
I feel a peaceful solitude.

As I walk on a lonely beach
with the cool breeze up on my face,
As I see the surf breaks into thousand mist
and the seagulls soar high -
I feel your grace the same way
when I kneel down to pay my homage,
to show my love at your shrine.

I feel your presence
I feel oneness with you.

© 2008 Sanjoy Haldar

On this Deepavali Night

Let the Festival of Light
remove all darkness from the soul –
each individual’s and collective mankind’s.

Let the Radiant illumine the mind
with power to dream, will to change
and resolve to do what’s right.

Let the light nourish the body,
to fight demons inside and out,
to stand up against all plight.

Let even the smallest diya bring
warmth of the thousand suns to a grieving soul
or that wretched shivering in the cold.

Let the array of lamps lit the way
to health and happiness,
to peace and prosperity.

Let on this very Deepavali night 

and always,
be in the light, be that LIGHT –
be a ray of hope to those astray.

This is my prayer for you and me!

Note: In the spirit of full disclosure, this prayer is  influenced by preaching of Swami Vivekananda.

© 2008 Sanjoy Haldar

Knock, knock in Playa del Carmen

Very recently, we visited the Mayan Riviera. Travelling with us were my friend Anjan, his wife Bitasta and their 3-year old daughter Adrika. She calls me jyaja which is derived from jyethu, meaning uncle in Bengali. This poem is about our interactions in the morning before we would head out of our hotel rooms. Here it goes.

The morning after the ruin visit -
Knock. Knock.
Who's there?
"Mayan ghost," replies a tiny voice,
"We are all Mayan ghosts
except jyaja - he's a doggy!"

We go up and down hwy 307
looking for Xcacel.
Green sea turtle, green sea turtle -
Where can we find you?
The very next morning -
Knock. Knock.
Who's there?
Sea turtle.
Our Mayan ghost is now a sea turtle!

Next stop. Xcaret.
We sample the Mayan theme.
The next morning. Knock. Knock.
Who's there?
Spider monkey.
The turtle turns into a monkey.

Every morning the same routine -
Knock. Knock.
Who's there?
Mayan ghost to sea turtle
Sea turtle to spider monkey.
Innocence and imagination
of a little girl -
Part of my Mayan Riviera experience.

Footnote: the ruin referenced here is Chichen-itza. Xcacel (pronounced Ish-ka-cell) is a Sea Turtle Conservatory. Xcaret (pronounced Shcaret) is an ecological theme park.

© 2008 Sanjoy Haldar

Intersection and Interval

Last evening, I attended the Levitt Shell Concert listening to Bill Evans, Grammy winning saxophonist. It was an incredible experience to listen to a Miles Davis alum in his Soulgrass concert. The name of the concert was befitting as his music interlaced with traditional bluegrass style is really soul searching. His bandmates were also fascinating performers creating an evening of liberating music from multiple genres - jazz, bluegrass and funk. He even did an improvization where his saxophone leads were matched by the violinist. Almost like what one will find in any India classical performance called Jugol Bandi where the lead instrumentalist and his/her accompanist go into an impromptu co-creation.

While physically there, my mind was travelling and I was reflecting upon my life. Intervals and intersections are my favorite time and place respectively because they represent enormous possibility. While there, I jotted the following lines on my Blackberry that I titled "Intersection and interval." Here it goes. . .

At a crossroad -
do you follow your head
or listen to your heart?
Down on the ground -
do you wait for a helping hand
or bounce back on your own?
Your destiny -
do you leave it to chances
or are you making a choice?
Are events in history shaping you
or are you going to shape history?

Where are you heading? Where? Where?
Is your life a destination or a journey?

When dreams are shattered
don't rescind -
dream even bigger,
reach out for the stars!
If promises are broken -
don't withdraw into your shell;
forgive and forget,
love even more with renewed vigor.

At a crossroad -
don't just obey your mind
follow your soul!

************************
© 2008 Sanjoy Haldar

To My Son on Father's Day

How I wish you were here.

When I wake up this morning I would rather -
prepare you breakfast than take flowers to your grave,
learn together the birds in our backyard
than hear their chirps at your final resting place,
answer your zillion innocent queries
than be tormented by the dead silence of the night.

I prayed to God, before you were born that, unlike me,
you can become whatever you chose to be.
Little did I know you wanted to be free!

I remember your tiny fingers wrapped around my index.
I wished I could hold your hands as you take your first steps.
I was to protect you, provide for you, till you become self-reliant.
But the odds were against us.
Now, you are my little guardian angel.

I wanted you –
to do things that I couldn't,
to go places,
to be pure, and perfect.
Above all, I wanted you to have fun –
play soccer in the rain
or go camping with friends.

In my mind's eyes,
I have seen you score your first goal.
I see your little arms going up in jubilation and
your eyes searching for us in the stand.

So many books I read at night
but, can I ever read you one and kiss you goodnight?

Many such dreams that I had woven have withered.

I am sad, and at times mad -
what is father's day without you?

But, I thank God for giving you –
my best gift ever -
for you gave me the joy of fatherhood.
My misfortune didn’t let me fulfill my role.

I know you are in a better place now
but, in the dark of the night, as I write this,
I can't suppress my timid desire -
I just wish you were here!

_______________________________________________
© 2008 Sanjoy Haldar

This Moment

This moment -

A mother rejoices her new born
Another father laments his loss –
an angel comes to the Garden of Eden
this very moment.

The morning sun ushers in a ray of hope.
Someplace else darkness falls –
an evil world wakes up into treachery and treason

This moment a seed of love gets planted
as a plot of deception unfolds.

An artist feels the pang of creation
The anarchist celebrates the plight of destruction

Someone’s first date, someone’s first kiss -
Someone’s parting kiss?
- a bride sees her love off to a war

While a family reunites, another breaks
right this very moment.

This very moment
We love, we hate
We revenge, we forgive

We are humans – God’s greatest creation!

© 2007 Sanjoy Haldar